Fear of Sharing…

When we were kids, we all had different kind of fears. The shadows in the night that materialize right after our parents switch off the light of your room. That creaky door that always use to give chills down your spine whenever you hear it in between the phase of waking up in the middle of the night. The sound of a bunch of dogs (may be cats for some) that kept barking till they open your eyes wide open. But none of them were even close enough to the fear of expressing yourself in front of people. That’s something in the human genes. Yes it can be controlled as we grow, but at first we all have dealt with situations where we were too hesitant to portray our side of the story.

We all (at least once) have passed through such experience, where we would have done a better job, but we never performed the way we always have visualized it in our mind. That depends upon several factors.

  • lack of confidence
  • resistance of hearing rejection
  • some specific incidence that lead to introversion

Whatever the circumstances might be, but think about it. How much the world is missing just because people are not being open to world they are supposed to? I’m not sure about the west, but here in the east, the education system is not producing any creative generation. Yes, there are a few who surpasses the system to grow their knowledge and expertise beyond the textbooks they are being advised to literally replicate in their minds. This ‘replication’ is causing our kids to lose their own identity. They are being oppressed to copy/paste the exact material found in the text books. Poor kids don’t even know what some specific topic in science or mathematics supposed to mean in our daily lives. They have no opinions of their own. They are being fed with immature and old concepts. I still remember, when I was a kid, I had a bit of a conflict with my teacher when he was teaching us about ‘The Solar System’. I was of the opinion that it’s not just one, there are several, and the teacher insisted there are not. I was right, I had a proof (read it in a ladybird book for kids based on Space). I always have been like this. Debating over some stuff, even over pronunciation of words, which a few of the times have lead me into some very serious trouble.

Beginning of an end

Beginning of an end

So… My concern is, let the pupil show their best. Let them feel the freshness of being free. Free to discuss their opinions. Free to express their view over any stuff. Try to make them participate in the class. A good teacher is always the one teaching ‘out-of-the-books’ things to his/her students. It’s always good to hear others thoughts. Especially the young minds. Their developing theories about nature of things they are yet to experience themselves. Academics is just for developing their professional knowledge, but what about the other experiences? There are a few things which can never be taught by writing long stories on the black-board. You have to involve them with yourselves. Try to make them read and write things that are current, things that can help them understand the nature of their existence, things that let them connect to their CREATOR.

I believe the ‘fear of sharing/expressing’ can be eliminated or at least minimized by showing love and respect for whatever opinion and views the young minds have, no matter how absurd it may sound. Eventually they would start believing themselves, and that can shift the thinking of millions of people in the later years. The ‘followers might turn into leaders 🙂

Unsettling Thoughts…

Rays of Actions...

Rays of Actions…

As mysterious as one might look like, sometimes I’m convinced they’ll be rather more surprising from inside. There comes moments almost daily in our life, when we are thinking on more than one topic at a time (voluntarily or not). It’s a gift of Mother Nature, or for some it could be a curse. We think a lot. In fact a lot of lot. The capacity and mechanism of human thinking is beyond our understanding. We cannot get rid of the thoughts segment of our brain. It’s ever charged, and ever working and ever creating its own fantasies (even while we are asleep). Which raises a question. Why do we have these inescapable, unnerving thoughts??? (Later about that…). We can always try, find and join those bits and pieces of information coming down upon us through different channels of our senses. Those are all inspirations…

Since birth till the transition, I think I have lost tons of precious time in obtaining nothing! It’s quite difficult to convince how, but I can affirmatively say that I was unable to think till I moved to the new city (I talked about in the earlier blog). I’m not sure how or when it occurred to me that I can think, but it was one of those beautiful feelings that one can never stop thanking GOD ALMIGHTY for. It’s like opening up of new horizons and possibilities that you have never ever imagined, nor believed to exist. Not just in the academics, but out of that four cornered building. I literally discovered myself and my CREATOR for the first time. Who am I, what’s I’m here for. What is the meaning of being alive, what’s true, what’s fake, human emotions: jealousy; love; enmity. It was not like I slept one night and when I opened my eyes, the world was different for me. No! It took a long way to learn, and it is still going on. I can never stop thanking ALLAH Almighty for opening the doors of blessings in the form of knowingness for me, the true understanding of life itself. I’m under perpetual gratitude and servitude. Those were the days I started to re-live my life. Although physically you would ask how? And I would be unable to answer, but the transition was more of metaphysical and spiritual than materialistic. And NO ONE would understand it until it has happened to his/herself. And I kept silent, until I met what seems like a mirror (a better mirror I must add) image of myself, one of the beautiful person I still have in my life (I’ll talk about it sometimes later).

Reading the lines of my first proper storybook “A boy from Makkah” by Muhammad Abdo Yamani. The words as if forming a complete new stage from my imagination, creating details and live size images inside my head, for every character, every scene. The first proper novel I read was Khuda ki Basti (Land of GOD) by Shaukat Siddiqi, a master piece of storytelling, roller-coaster of emotions and incredible detailing of both the characters, locations and scenes. Then later the ever wonderful J.K. Rowling’s Harry Potter series. It was a visual paradise for me. Creating a magical world of my own, (I never saw its movies before starting the series). It was always captivating. I’m a slow reader. Sometimes reading the same page for like 4-5 times until and unless it makes an image out of itself. I enjoy words like that. That’s my style of enjoying art and especially literature.

I personally feel that it’s almost impossible for me to shut my thoughts (and of course the senses too). Yes, the focal point can be changed, which comes from certain exercises. But still, it is too difficult. I do not have an analogy to perfectly define the case. To give a very mundane idea about it, take the example of Bella, yes Bella from Twilight. When she was turned into a vampire, the power of her senses increases several hundred times, i.e. listening, hearing, smelling and seeing more. This transition was presented in a very superficial and comical way. But if you consider it as a slow & gradual process, it does happen with humans (not the part where they start drinking blood :P).

We all have definitely experienced the feeling, while coming back from work on a silent road, while taking small sips of a hot drink sitting in a lawn or gallery enjoying nature, even while sitting on (this one is funny) a toilet seat or whenever we are alone somewhere. Our senses seems to increase. We can feel, hear and see more (even more than what is actually real). So coming to a conclusion, the thoughts are always there during the whole day but when we start focusing, we start making sense out of it. We began to comprehend it, rather than letting go of these inspirations.

Inspirations can be both blessing and a motivation, determining the course of action we move upon in response to that specific stimulus. At the same time inspirations could be both lethal and destructive. The difference lies in our attitude. How do we absorb those inspirations (the overall thoughts as a whole) can amplify our productivity and can bring behavioral changes in us. We all have observed e.g. while reading some beautiful poetry; or listening to a romantic song; or observing a well detailed surreal photograph, it moves you! It brings a change in us. Directly influencing our emotions. That’s a direct impact. Indirectly the thoughts that I discussed earlier, those random and on-going stream of information going by our senses, throughout the day (sort of short term memories), can create an impact as well. It all depends upon the individual, how s/he absorbs those inspirations and make the best use of it. In the end… keep thinking, it’s healthy, and be inspired, it’s fun! 🙂

(6:56 pm Jan 17, 2014)

P.S. for each blog post I’m adding a photograph that I took sometime, somewhere, connecting to that particular feelings and describing the mood.